Monday, March 30, 2020

BACKWARD IN TIME

Kim has asked us to reprise an autobiographical poem
from our archives, write a bit of introduction, and
close with a haiku.
Submitted to dVerse
March 20, 2020
**************
 I was widowed at 45 and my life changed suddenly
from married life to single life, which occasioned
this poem.  It's pretty self-explanatory!

I approached forty-five in a manner quite staid
The children were grown, the mortgage almost paid
I had all the answers, I knew what came next
Retirement, grandchildren, just like in the text.
Then Fate shuffled the cards and dealt a new hand
“You’re alone now”, Fate said, “Just where do you stand?”
“I don’t know”, I shouted, as I dealt with my sorrow,
“But somehow I’ll manage to plan for tomorrow”.
So I set out to consider just where I’d belong
“You’ll do fine”, people said, “You’ve always been strong”.
Didn’t they know it was scary out there
Facing life as a single when you’d been half of a pair?
And I, who only yesterday had seemed to know it all,
In my single encounters felt exceedingly small.
Suddenly, in my middle years, thanks to fickle Fate,
To my utter amazement I accepted a date.

And the wizard of the PTA felt once again quite stupid
As now once more, as at sixteen, she’s targeted by cupid.
My thoughts turned back to the late-night talks
When my daughter sat on my bed.
So wise I was then, so opposite now
What great thing was it I’d said?
“Mother’s doing quite well”, said daughter to son.
“It’s good she’s found life still can be fun.”
And they, whom I’d counseled in this, that and the other
Now took up the task of bringing up mother.
“Remember our talks, Mom, when you expected the worst?
They’re the same now”, said daughter,
“But the roles are reversed“.
I’m grateful, Lord, you’ve let me know
It’s still good to be alive.
But, is there some way that we could forego
This puberty at forty-five?

******************
the seasons of life
are incredibly humbling

14 comments:

  1. Forty-five is a strange age, especially when one is parent to grown-up children and facing the single life again. Sometimes it’s comforting to let them do the parenting for a change.
    I like the rhyming poem very much, Bev, but on Haibun Monday we usually ask for one to three tight paragraphs of prose followed by a traditional haiku.

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    1. Sorry, misunderstood. I thought the intro was to be in prose form and the poem to follow with haiku. Would you like me to change it to paragraph form?

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  2. What a turn of event having to face a life as a single... and 45 isn't that old... almost like being 20 again.

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  3. Forty five I'd the youngest still a toddler! Good for you starting again though :)

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  4. This made me both smile and brought a tear to my eye. Lovely.

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  5. These lines jump out at me:
    "Didn’t they know it was scary out there
    Facing life as a single when you’d been half of a pair?"
    Your poem is so poignant. That feeling you've got things altogether then a bomb drops. Timely for the Covid-19 as well.

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  6. That's so young to be widowed. I'm glad you got a second go round. I'm sure your first husband would have wanted you to be happy.

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    1. Actually, I didn't remarry. He was my only husband. I fell briefly in lust, but alas it was with a frog in prince disguise!

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  7. The Scary part spoke to me. Life is always scary even though we act brave

    Much❤love

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  8. Puberty at 45 -- what an amazing, incredulous reality some must face in this way. time moves on.....and we must do so also.

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    1. And I did move on....to a career and an amazingly fulfilling life with my children, good friends and good times! I've now been widowed for more years than I was married!

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  9. Ah yes, life has a way of teaching us we don't have all the answers. A great poem!

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  10. You last line made me smile! Seems like we cycle from childhood and adolescence to adult and back again. Well done.

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  11. Beautifully put. Life is always letting us know that we should live for each day, because we never know what tomorrow will bring.

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