Poetics Tuesday. I've chosen a line from Gibran (To melt and be like a running brook that carries its melody to the night) and included it in what may be an octave, but lost in the A B C D's.
Submitted to dVerse December 8, 2020
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Carried by the brooklet that rambles the meadow
Riding the ripples, lost in evening's glow
To melt and be like a running brook that sings its melody to the night
Meandering rivulets carrying me where'er they might
I might be a princess under some foreign moon
Perhaps a lass frolicking the mists of Brigadoon
Miracles and magicals, wild and free
Where'er the brooklet has taken me.
I would follow that brooklet too, Bev, ‘riding the ripples, lost in evening's glow’!
ReplyDeleteA magical fantasy.
There's a lyrical quality, like I would imagine the sound the "meandering rivulets" would make. I like your use of "where'er" in here. It fits with the mystical atmosphere. Very nice, Beverly!
ReplyDelete"Carried by the brooklet...
ReplyDeleteRiding the ripples"
what lovely lyrical lines to get carried away on
I do love how you begin the poem... the sound of water can be like music, and what a wonderful guide it can be.
ReplyDeleteLovely sway and meter and internal rhyme. This is so lovely to read, Beverly.
ReplyDeleteCarried me away like a river, Bev. Well done.
ReplyDeleteSuch wonderful freedom snd release in this piece Bev. Wonderful to read. I am still floating downstream... :)
ReplyDeleteThank you, Rob. While I'm afraid of water, yet its sound has a fascination for me that invariably weaves a spell.
DeleteBeautiful and lyrical, Beverly.
ReplyDeleteLoving the freedom of your words, like the brooklet at the evening.
ReplyDeleteI too enjoyed the lyrical feel of the poem and I always enjoy rhymes. It would make a good mediation setting.
ReplyDeleteThis is a rustic paean to mystical freedom - I love it! Reminds me of 'Nymphs and Shepherds come away.' by Thomas Shadwell.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Ingrid. The sound of water always leads me on mystical journeys!
DeleteI like the airy feel of this. The play of water through light.
ReplyDeleteGorgeous, gorgeous, gorgeous!!💝💝
ReplyDeleteThe final line is the perfect ending to this magical piece. I feel like I've travelled with the brooklet!
ReplyDeleteI love the fancy of this, especially this line:
ReplyDelete"Where'er the brooklet has taken me"
The diminutive 'brooklet' gives this an added twinkle!
ReplyDeleteYour poem is chock full of mystical magical beauty. I am ready to ride the ripples.
ReplyDeleteThere is a sweet surrender in those "meandering rivulets," full of mysticism and spirituality 👏💖✨
ReplyDeleteThis is lovely!
ReplyDeleteMiracles and magicals, wild and free
ReplyDeleteWhere'er the brooklet has taken me.
Great close Bev, leaving the reader still smiling wondering where it will lead to!
Hank
We chose the same line and used some of the same images... I so love "Brigadoon" We might be soul mates.
ReplyDeleteI like the way you wove that line into your poem (I used the same one) always a wonder where the river goes.
ReplyDelete